2 Samuel 13:20
ESV
And her brother Absalom said to her, "Has Amnon your brother been with you? Now hold your peace, my sister. He is your brother; do not take this to heart." So Tamar lived, a desolate woman, in her brother Absalom 's house.
NIV
Her brother Absalom said to her, "Has that Amnon, your brother, been with you? Be quiet for now, my sister; he is your brother. Don’t take this thing to heart." And Tamar lived in her brother Absalom’s house, a desolate woman.
NASB
Then Absalom her brother said to her, 'Has Amnon your brother been with you? But now keep silent, my sister, he is your brother; do not take this matter to heart.' So Tamar remained and was isolated in her brother Absalom’s house.
CSB
Her brother Absalom said to her: "Has your brother Amnon been with you? Be quiet for now, my sister. He is your brother. Don’t take this thing to heart." So Tamar lived as a desolate woman in the house of her brother Absalom.
NLT
Her brother Absalom saw her and asked, 'Is it true that Amnon has been with you? Well, my sister, keep quiet for now, since he’s your brother. Don’t you worry about it.' So Tamar lived as a desolate woman in her brother Absalom’s house.
KJV
And Absalom her brother said unto her, Hath Amnon thy brother been with thee? but hold now thy peace, my sister: he is thy brother; regard not this thing. So Tamar remained desolate in her brother Absalom's house.
NKJV
And Absalom her brother said to her, “Has Amnon your brother been with you? But now hold your peace, my sister. He is your brother; do not take this thing to heart.” So Tamar remained desolate in her brother Absalom’s house.
What does 2 Samuel 13:20 mean?
Tamar is openly expressing her grief about being raped by her half-brother Amnon. She knows that her culture will abandon her: she will never marry or have children. She was once a princess. She's now culturally dismissed: seen as worthless and shameful.Absalom, Tamar's full brother, hears what has happened and comes to Tamar. He seems to have an idea of what happened. Amnon may have given signs that raised those suspicions. Absalom's response may make it look like he's dismissing the incident, telling Tamar to hold her peace, or to keep it quiet. But that's not the case. In middle eastern cultures, even today, a woman's perceived sexual virtue is a direct reflection on her brothers' honor. Absalom tells her to do the only thing she really can do: to make peace with her new lot in life as a virtually unmarriageable woman. Unlike Amnon, Absalom does not abandon his sister. He takes her in and provides for her as part of his own household because he knows that she will not likely have any other options.
For Tamar, through her perspective and until she dies, her life is functionally over. But that's not the larger story. Her strength, wisdom, and integrity are written down for people to read thousands of years later. Her words give voice to the many women assaulted and abused in her time. The plot of her story very much reflects Bathsheba's (2 Samuel 11:2–4), but instead of being silent, she speaks out like Abigail (1 Samuel 25). And God has a promise for her and everyone in her situation:
"'Sing, O barren one, who did not bear;
break forth into singing and cry aloud,
you who have not been in labor!
For the children of the desolate one will be more
than the children of her who is married,' says the Lord."--Isaiah 54:1
