Verse

2 Samuel 13:15

ESV Then Amnon hated her with very great hatred, so that the hatred with which he hated her was greater than the love with which he had loved her. And Amnon said to her, "Get up! Go!"
NIV Then Amnon hated her with intense hatred. In fact, he hated her more than he had loved her. Amnon said to her, "Get up and get out!"
NASB Then Amnon hated her with a very great hatred; indeed, the hatred with which he hated her was greater than the love with which he had loved her. And Amnon said to her, 'Get up, go away!'
CSB So Amnon hated Tamar with such intensity that the hatred he hated her with was greater than the love he had loved her with. "Get out of here!" he said.
NLT Then suddenly Amnon’s love turned to hate, and he hated her even more than he had loved her. 'Get out of here!' he snarled at her.
KJV Then Amnon hated her exceedingly; so that the hatred wherewith he hated her was greater than the love wherewith he had loved her. And Amnon said unto her, Arise, be gone.
NKJV Then Amnon hated her exceedingly, so that the hatred with which he hated her was greater than the love with which he had loved her. And Amnon said to her, “Arise, be gone!”

What does 2 Samuel 13:15 mean?

Amnon angrily and forcefully orders Tamar out of his room. Although the text has used the English word "love" for Amnon's feelings toward his sister Tamar (2 Samuel 13:1–2), Amnon's actions have revealed that his desire was nothing but obsessive sexual attraction. Now, after raping her over her urgent pleading that he stop (2 Samuel 13:11–14), every illusion of his "love" for Tamar is gone and replaced by something that can only be called "hate." The verse describes the intensity of his hatred for Tamar as being even greater than the strong feelings of false "love" he had before he violated her.

Amnon's reaction is not unique among men. Far too often, some men believe themselves to be "in love" with a woman only to find that their feelings turn bitter and ugly when they have sex with her or take sex from her. Instead of seeing that they are guilty of turning a woman into a mere object of desire that can never possibly satisfy the longings of their hearts, they blame the woman for not living up to the fantasy they built her into. Worse, like Amnon, they find a way to blame her for their acts of violence.

For Tamar, his rejection is a greater breach of trust than his assault (2 Samuel 13:16). Deuteronomy 22:28–29 says that if a man rapes a woman of marrying age who is not engaged, he must marry her: presumably with the approval of the woman and her father. He must give her all rights as a wife and never divorce her. He has defiled her, and very few men would be willing to take her for his wife and give her children. God created this strange law for the Israelites to protect women and make men think twice before indulging in their lusts. Tamar is right: Amnon's a fool (2 Samuel 13:13).
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